Costa Rica Expat Guide to Winning Friends and Influencing Natives

In the famous book by Dale Carnegie, How to Win Friends and Influence People, the author spreads 30 key principles of influence over its 4 parts. But the one principle that is perhaps most applicable to this Costa Rica expat guide to winning friends and influencing natives is…

Become genuinely interested in other people.

You might think, well that sounds easy. After all, what could be more interesting than immersing in a culture foreign to your own?

If that’s your attitude, then great. Perhaps it will indeed be “easy.”

However, over the many years I’ve lived in Costa Rica, I’ve noticed that many expats, while they might talk of being interested, don’t really live their lives here showing much of it. They patronize the ticos, as if they’re poor souls who need “our help.” They become quite adept at using the ticos, since many services can be obtained at a fraction of the cost for the same ones back home.

But are they really interested? Do they really show any interest? And do the ticos even notice one way or the other?

There are, of course, plenty of reasons we gringos should be interested in the ticos. After all, they consistently are rated as being the happiest group of humans on earth. Moreover, Costa Rica has these so-called “blue zones” where some of the greatest examples of human longevity can be found.

Granted, the tico culture is in some ways similar to any other. Wherever you end up calling home, you will find cliques of locals that are hard to break into. It will take some effort. The ticos will welcome you, that’s for sure, but perhaps not so much with “open arms.” First you will have to endear yourself to them. And that requires that you be interested in them. In that regard, Dale Carnegie offers valuable advice for expat immersion success.

How does one go about doing this? Well, you need to do it in ways that you feel comfortable with, even though initially doing it might make you a bit uncomfortable.

Learning to enjoy their sport, soccer, is vital. More importantly, learning to call it by its proper name, fútbol, can be a great start. Take care not to jump on any one team’s side too quickly. That’s a great way to become endearing to some, while alienating yourself from many others. It’s OK to answer the common question of whether you are for La Liga, or Saprissa (the two historic national rivalry teams) with one or the other, but just don’t be too overly vehement about it.

And, of course, always voice and display rousing support for Costa Rica’s national team, La Selección. You can do this by showing up for the games at popular viewing places, wearing national team colors. And be as vocal in your support as they are. That will win you a lot of respect…believe me!

It goes without saying that learning to be conversational with the Spanish language will go a long way in helping you immerse, win friends, and influence the natives. If you need to take a course, take one. But more than anything else, talk with them. The best way to learn how to actually speak a foreign language is to, well, speak it and speak it often.

I could ramble on in this brief Costa Rica expat guide to winning friends with countless other tips, but they’d all amount basically to just good common sense. The major things to remember are that the ticos deserve your respect, their culture indeed merits your interest, and yes they certainly do notice your indifference.